Blackout

I'm writing a scene where my main character can't remember what happened to her the previous night. I wish it wasn't based on personal experience, but of course it is.

There is a certain weird serendipity to memory loss, even such as it is, a snippet of time that ultimately doesn't matter. Sometimes it's better to let amnesia do the heavy lifting of forgetfulness. Sometimes it's good to let that healing begin in oblivion.

Or maybe I'm just full of shit.

One of my therapist's gems

"You may not get closure from (that other party), but you can bring it to yourself."

Button-pushing

I'm pretty liberal with the Defriend and Unfollow buttons. Basically, if I think you're an asshole and you're not interesting enough to keep around despite that fact, you're out of there. It's not as though I don't have enough friends to go around, chump.

Sonora

I just realized

The greatest love of my life is reading -- and has been for years -- the story of what is essentially my greatest heartbreak. In a way it unites those two circumstances. In a way it puts them at odds that -- I must admit -- amuse and intrigue me.

They say living well is the best revenge. Live well, then, and take revenge where you can.

Today's writing

The Poway Community Library was recently remodeled, which means that it had reliable wifi, all kinds of cute little seating areas and a whole hell of a lot of preschoolers doing what preschoolers generally do: run everywhere, break the sound barrier and just pretty much annoy everyone around them. I know it may have been premature to say at 17 years old that my uterus was going to remain unoccupied for the rest of my life, but some decisions just make themselves.

But yes. The library. One thing is now had going for it was a cool open courtyard with a bunch of tables and chairs set in the shade. This was important when you were living 20 miles inland in a desert. Out here you could still hear the echoes of the screams, but at least you weren’t totally subject to the screams themselves. It’s kind of chaos once removed. Once removed isn’t such a bad place to be. It’s actually where I prefer to hang out, rather than in the center of things. You can be seen in the center. Seen, summed up and judged.