Go A's -- in 2015!

 

So true.

So. True. 

I'd like to thank those who hurt me

 Seriously. You sons of bitches gave me reason to go on, purpose to push past the pain. Thanks, assholes. 

Open House

 

Family Secrets trailer

It's here. I'm in the beginning. 

Pixar!

 

Dan Hoyle's performance class

I'm doing it this time around. From what I'm writing:

I move to kiss Baz goodbye, but he’s already gone and following instructions. “Well,” I say, “I’m going to slip out before he gets back.” She smiles in response, but there is no need for me to hide my departure. He loves it here. He doesn’t care that I’m leaving. He’s never had separation anxiety. If that’s such a good thing, why does it hurt so much?

Today's writing

It wasn’t as though I’m saying Jax and Sid were always tight. That would be a little too perfect, too punchy, too much of a love story. It also wouldn’t be the truth.

Sid was always the perfect dog for a boy, but Jax not often the perfect boy for that dog. In his slobbery, panting way, Sid needs, wants love. This pissed Jax off. I wish I could say I didn’t understand why, but the fact is that I know: he just didn’t want to give the energy, the time, the space, the attention. What he gave to others took away from him.

I know this because I am the same way.

 

Dreams

I dreamt last night that Adam asked for a divorce. I woke up terrified and so relieved it wasn't real. I asked him about it and he said: "You're not going to have that dream fulfilled."

Thing is, I bring up divorce when I'm pissed. I bring it up far more than I should. This really makes me rethink that little tactic. 

Anxiety

Things feel messy and incomplete. The revision is challenging at the very least. Time to unplug for a while. 

WordSpace residency

I'm in San Francisco trying to write. Or, rather, attempting to revise. Revision is a bitch or, rather, I am revision's bitch. It's so hard for me to look at a completed manuscript and figure out where to from here. It's easier to rewrite the goddamned thing. I feel so stuck right now.

Here's my first paragraph:

Sid changes just when I’m beginning to heal. I keep telling myself that it’s no big deal, just the aging process, but I’ve trained myself for too long to look for the little signs. Personality, behavior, habits – all shifting away from the dog I’ve always known.

Where to from here? Who knows?

Tonight