Thursday, December 22, 2011

The winter weather

I've had many ups and downs lately. This week I've had both. Monday I felt paralyzed by anxiety, Tuesday depression. Yesterday I took the dogs to St. Louis and was better.

Fact is, I'm at a crossroads. There is so much I want to do and boundaries I have refused to acknowledge. Mainly, I want to get the Project published, and that is so damn hard.

I am very open about having anxiety and depression and taking medication for it. Sometimes I think I'm on way too much medication. Sometimes I wonder if I ... DO I wonder if I shouldn't? Actually, I'm scared to stop. And there's no reason to do so.

Am I homesick? Yes and no. I still would be feeling this at home. Here my shit is just amplified and I HAVE to deal with it, which is not a bad thing. Except for when it is ...

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