Editing this

After Nails had reported to me that Matt had been accepted to UCSB – early, as planned – he showed me the email on his phone. “Check it out,” he said.

Check it out, like it wasn’t that big a deal, like it wasn’t his future, right, Mrs. Love? Except it was a huge deal. Every time I thought about it, my stomach tightened to the point where it felt as though water couldn’t even pass through. My throat constricted too as if to keep it company, making me feel like I was being strangled from the inside out.

He wasn’t leaving for months.

But he would leave.

And I would never have the courage to tell him I loved him.