“ 'There’s a difference between love as it is presented in movies and music as this jazzy sexy thing that involves bikini underwear and what love actually turns out to be,' said the psychologist Mary Pipher, whose book 'Another Country' looked at the emotional life of the elderly. 'The really interesting script isn’t that people like to have sex. The really interesting script is what people are willing to put up with.'”

A really amazing New York Times article on the various meanings of love, up to and including Sandra Day O'Connor's extremely unselfish joy at her husband's discovery of new passion.

My experience? Sex isn't the difficult part. You're stoked when you find it with someone who's awesome, and you share that sizzle and those romps. Companionship is harder -- I'm marrying my best drinking buddy, and I'm stoked. Working through the tough shit -- the fights in the kitchen, the angry and turned back in the bed -- now that takes a hell of a lot.

Adam and I have had our share of strife. The upside is that that strife, nearly 95 percent of the time if not more, leads to a greater shared understanding of one another.

And to the occasional throwing of a remote control.