Revise

Ruth had loved two men before Jack came along. One was Gary, her husband, blue of eye, faithful of heart. The other was Russ. Right now, the less said about Russ the better. In time.

Later she would wonder if there might have been another way, if she and Gary had been in a different place, a better one, if things might not have gone differently. Under the covers, in the dark, she would know that would never be the case.

When we love, read a book she’d picked up in college and never finished, we always strive to become better than we are. In the months after Jack walked in, she would wonder if this was true. She certainly didn’t feel as though she was striving for anything. In fact, as the relationship progressed, the only striving that was occurring was her continued insistence on secrecy, her demands on herself that they were to remain just friends.

Just friends! What did that even mean? Did it mean an absolute lack of sexual tension, no interest whatsoever? Was there really such a thing?