Adam and I were paging through the wedding discussion forum on Craigslist. "That's the worst forum I've ever seen," he said. "Trolls and flamers everywhere."

What amazes me is all the jockeying for one-upmanship, women who spend a year or more bossing around EVERYONE, only to play blushing bride on the Big Day.

What do I want?

Something incredibly simple. City Hall would suffice for me, or a ceremony in the backyard. If it takes more than fairly minimal effort to plan, I don't want it. If it causes anger or inconvenience to anyone, if it costs anyone (us or guests) a significant amount of money, if it involves interpersonal politics, I don't want it.

I never thought about my wedding day. I never dreamt of it or plotted it. I just hoped I would find someone who would love me as I am.