I'll sometimes talk to Adam about "if I had a different life ..." As in, if I had a different life, fill in the blank.

This is not to say I want a different life. I'm very happy with the one I have. Sometimes in the course of conversation, though, the subject of what I would do were I not married and committed in certain ways comes up.

For example: the University of Wisconsin-Madison fellowships. If I were single, I would totally go for something like this. Or living in Tokyo for a month (or maybe longer) at a place like the Sakura House.

Come to think of it, though, the Sakura House is something Adam and I could do together. He would also never hold me back if I wanted to go somewhere to advance my writing. When I went to Costa Rica for a month to be a resident at the Julia and David White Artists Colony, he not only supported me but came down to spend a week there.

There are many different lives. I've chosen mine and am happy.