People who are constantly trumpeting their achievements annoy the shit out of me. I know I've been guilty of this myself from time to time, but it still doesn't stop me from being hypocritical and loathing it in others.
Adam had an unnamed douchebag friend over a while back. This guy never shuts up about how great he is. NEVER. At one point he said to me: "So-and-so looked at me the other day and said: 'You're the nicest guy I know.'"
Roger Ebert once wrote: "Sophomorism uses a hammer; wit uses a scalpel. Sophomorism cries out for your attention; wit assumes it has it." Don't TELL me how great you are. Be confident enough to let me decide for myself.
I told him that he was not the nicest guy I know, and that in fact, Adam (who was hiding in the bathroom, probably laughing at my predicament) is the nicest person I know.
I had an addendum, though. I'm the nicest person I know, motherfucker, for not smashing your head in and then tossing your sorry ass out of my house for being such a damn stuck-on-yourself, self-centered, bragging fool. So there.
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